Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Spies Like Us

What I’m about to say is kind of confidential, and I don’t want you people spreading this personal anecdote around the internet, ok?

My father was in the CIA.

(my father in disguise with an unidentified man)

I’m not lying! He was an honest to God spook for the Central Intelligence Agency. This is how I found out…

I did a Google search for the words “CIA” and “President Bush” because I was trying to figure out what this whole Valerie Plame thing is about, and what it has to do with me (Cheney’s been keeping me out of the loop lately, and the New York Times is too wordy). So I clicked on ‘I’m feeling lucky’ and what do you know… George H. W. Bush: Director of the CIA. Dad! How come he never told me!

Now, this is exciting news; my dad was a spy! But I need you people to keep it secret. Remember, this is a personal Blog for friends and family, not for terrorists! Don’t go around publishing news articles or something stupid like that because it could compromise his secret identity as an average citizen/former President of the United States.

Can you imagine the amount of terror a spy would go through upon discovering that he/she had been outed? Not only is it a felony, but it is an abomination, and a breach of national security! Whosoever sinks low enough in life to divulge the secret identity of a spy is verily an asshole. I dare say I would rank them as low as the terrorists.

So. Back to my google search. In the mean time, if anyone wants to tell me what’s going on with the whole Valeria Plame thing, please, send a message my way. Cause I am so in the dark, it is ridiculous.

Email: Sonovabush@gmail.com (will trade National Secrets for a brief 2 to 3 page summary; double spaced, times new roman – my name at the top of the page on the left hand side along with date and subject)


David Roman said...

good stuff George, Your "secret's" safe with me!

Karl Rove said...

I think that woman works for the CIA. I know I've seen her around before. I better check with the media.......I bet they know if she's with the CIA.